我的天

The thing I wanted to happen didn't arise today. It's my most afraid thing-800-metre race. When I heard this new, I almost wanted to scream for too happy and also wanted to die for too disappear. The sword has two sides, the matter had two great effective on me too. In this month, the whole universities in Guangzhou are carrying the honest campaign; do you think my tennis teacher is honest? He committed we would have our 800-metre test this week, and the week before last week he also promised we would have our test in last week. He broke his words twice, how can I believe him the third? Is he not honest? He needs change?

Today, I think my tennis teacher praised me. When I hit the ball, he said some good in the other side to me. And then he came to my side and watched my show for a couple of minutes and asked me "Have you attended the tennis league?" My answer was of course not. So he said "Your movement is all right, until your pat throw in front of you, you take the pat back too fast, you must take back in this way." At the same time, he held my hand and taught me sever times in the right way. I never imagined this chance would shoot at me. At that moment, I realized my hard work got a good result at last. My extra practices let me reach my goal! Thought now I am still not very perfect, yet I get a prize instead of a shout, that means a success. While this kind of success is not my first aid, yet it maybe the first step of my great dream. Life is not easy for any of us; we must work hard everyday. A step can't reach the sky. The ways leading to dream are full of difficulty. ¡xrspook no te rajes! The great success will come to you one day.

In the English classes, we translated Chinese into English. The teacher taught us some skills. At that moment, I knew my English was so poor, the sentences I could translate, but all in a very ugly ways. The sentence has great Chinese feeling, not a native English, also not a normal English. The English has a strong own manner, the manner just myself can confer, also it means it's a wrong one. And from next week, all of us will have to stand on the platform to have our own topic. Topic, topic, topic, I hate it! In high school I met too many that thing. Although this time our content of our presentation is design by us, I don't like it either.

Every other day I write an English daily, is it enough?

今天的日子乱成一团。首先是因为昨晚的突然停电，从晚上7多停到晚上11：30，所有的节奏全都被打乱。幸好已经洗澡洗衣写日记，正在做实验报告，记过令我当天的作业不可当天完成，可恶！没电即没水，一个宿舍4个人围着不断地吃东西，足足吃了1个小时，然后我去睡觉，她们不得不开手电赶今天要交的“毛论”。

今天的噩梦从高数开始，下星期的今天即星期三就要考前3章，是其中考，昨天的英语，明天的800米，下星期的高数，这段日子好苦闷。高数可是几乎一点不会，每次作业都是在“参考”的帮助下完成的，只剩下一个星期，怎么补。三章书啊！180多页，几乎等于以前的一整本数学书了，况且数学这东西不是背了就行了，还要理解，但我现在连背都不会，如何去灵活运用地做啊！

郁闷的事情远不止这件，还有下午的专业概论，要写关于这个专业的看法。论据是专业概论讲的几堂课的内容。但我一点笔记都没有做啊！我还以为不用考试，上的那些课也没什么好考的，没有规范的教材，谁知它却要以这样一篇东西结束这个课程。每次上课我都是在半睡半醒的状态下进行，我真不知该如何写。要写1500字绝对不是问题，但现在我连写的中心话题也不明确。

晚上，郁闷的事情仍然在继续，搞什么“联谊”。与林学院的木材与工程（家具设计方向），有是“XX与工程”，有3个字是相同的，但实际上却没半点联系。一堆人就分成几个小组，6、7人围成圈，中间放一根蜡烛，然后开始所谓“联谊”。话匣子一向很难打开，这次也不例外。在室外吹着风，人很冷，但场面的气氛比人的体温还要低。最终是几个游戏打破了这种局面，但我还是投入不了。快乐是他们的，我什么也没有。脑子里一片空白，什么念头也没有，什么想法都不存在。

郁闷啊！为什么日记可以如此郁闷。最好笑的居然是“毛论”的男老师（唯一在教室上课的男老师），他昨天穿今天这件衣服，没有换，但那件是T-shirt，难道与他是山西人有关（不常换衣服），更搞笑的是他前几周（从一开学）就穿着同一套衣服，于是我们就据此预测冬天他会一直穿这件黑色的衣服（嘿嘿）。老师老穿同样的衣服也让人好郁闷啊！

So much embarrass courses endless upset!!!

Today I have my first really test in South China Agriculture University. It’s an English quiz. The first study’s test I can say, I failed.

The mark is not good at all. I haven’t imagined I would get such a result. I am upset. Maybe I am the hardest one in my room (in this subject), but the result is the third, it means the second on upside down.

I can’ complain anyone or anything. The mark showed my real level. I had done my best to recite the new words and phrase expressions by heart. I am sure, just except a couple of words; I had recited all the words skilled. And at this time, I proved a sentence said by “Longge” -“Don’t hope the things you don’t know won’t appear in the test paper, or you must fail.” I failed at this point. I don’t know clearly the meaning of “allow for”, but it appeared. I promise I will make everything clearly; it’s unworthy failing in such situation.

I will recite the new words and phrases when the unit is learning; I won’t just a few days before the test start my reciting, never!

The weak point of mine is my translation. No matter Chinese to English or English to Chinese. But all this sentences of translation came from my textbook. I swear I won’t miss a half in future. Recite some meaningful and powerful sentences. But the Chinese I have no idea to do them well, my Chinese is so poor, how can I do well in it? Though in these test paper, the correcting person wasn’t very Justin to me. So my achievement is just 1.5 point lower than the highest one in my room. Or you can say is not a distant. But my aid is not her, but all the classmates in my class, all the students in SCAU, all the people in Guangzhou. I must the best so I can let my dream come true. 72.5 can’t satisfy me forever!!! Do I just have that power?

When the test paper sent out to me, I couldn’t believe the true, though in English class I had known my achievement would be more or less, but the others marks really startled at me. I am not the best and also nor the worse, but this time, I can’t stand!!! I can fail in other subjects, but English, I can’t fail a little, and I must the best, if I must go to foreign country. If I can’t learn a foreign language well, how can I be good at another one?

It’s time for me to do my best in English!!! Maybe half an hours ago I didn’t feel well, but from this second, I will change the upset and angry into my energy, become a powerful man. (Daily is a place to let me speak up, let me relax, what a great thing!)

今天一觉醒来，好的风啊！气温与昨天晚上相比简直是天渊之别。昨晚睡觉的时候还笑广州的天气预报为什么那么差劲，说昨天最低18度，实际上只有28度，还说今天最低气温可达16度，最高也不过24度。从昨天看来，的确不可能。但今天早上的事实却证明了这一切。

早上6；30，天还没亮，不知是阴天的还是其它原因。我不得不老早爬起来，早上8：00有课，7：40必须到达课室早读，这种日子，好烦啊！如果是自愿我一定没有半点怨言，但一切都是被迫的。读大学也是被人像小学生般看管。唯一不同的就是他们的威胁方式不同，不是要见家长而是要扣学分。学分学分，学生的命根，因为学分，我们的脖子就不得不受人控制，听人使唤。

机械制图课室的多媒体还没弄好，已经上课6、7周了，还说什么迎评，评个屁，连最基本的设施都没有，还希望有什么好成绩。表面上说什么迎评活动风风火火，其实都是表面功夫，是形式主义，根本没有半点用处。SCAU已经连续5次评不上了，这第6次也不会有什么好消息。平时不做好，临急抱佛脚，简直是废物中的废物。一切都是赶出来的，根本不代表什么情况。老生就在为所欲为，新生就在搞下马威，一事不同人，总有一天摔大跤。

今天居然忘记带西文课本去早读，太失败了！明天测验英语，听说都是课本里的东西。华农的老师有什么水平可言，字典都不会抄要抄课本。况且英语不是只会几个单词就了事的，它偏偏爱考单词。我又最不喜欢被单词，现在单词还没好，想背，但没有心情。

今天的日记之所以不是英文，因为我觉得如果天天写英文就会使我的灵感消失得好快。没有那种“气”去写英文周记，有山穷水尽的感觉，不可以把文章一气呵成，写上句忘下句，我别无选择。本来我的英文思维和中文思维是很不同的，英文的思维会更开放更像个女孩也更有独到的政治观与正义感。至于为什么我也不知道。外语的文章就是没有中文那样乏味。我需要保持这种特殊的思维，不能让它不伦不类。

好大的风啊！好象我爱的冬天真的来了！

每个星期天都这样子赶来赶去，下午4点多就吃饭，然后5点必须出门口，6：30分之前赶到学生公寓开学院的例会，而星期六晚上则通常要打日记到星期天早上3、4点才睡觉，累啊！然后星期天早上又要10点爬起来去下载。这哪里是休息，比正常的生活还要累啊！还要做作业，还要复习（但通常回到家就不干放一边了，高三时也这样）。

以前星期天晚上是relax看电视的，看英文台，看一个星期才播一次的肥皂剧，然后第二天回去就可以大说特说。但如今，连电视都没得看，哪里谈什么大说特说，况且在这里根本没有看那些东西的人，都是看日韩港台的偶像剧（我从来都不看），我现在不看，以后也一定不看，免得使自己胡思乱想。我认为那些人只有一张俏脸皮，表情语言神态说话都全部非专业，演技当然就XX了。但他们就是“帅”，你吹咩！因此迷倒万千观众。他们的生活，他们的学历，他们的人生目标，他们的台风也十分有问题，他们除了“帅”就什么也没有。可能还有一样他们也许很好的，就是“背书”。我从来不看，一方面因为我看不起他们，另一方面是因为我知道自己的自控能力不好，很容易中招掉入深渊，见一个爱一个，我不要再成为那样的人了。

我不明白为什么JEA的新闻也消失了，所有网站都没有他的新闻，他也累了，需要休息吗？其中用emule下载的那个Anita, no te rajes的网页整个被删除了，怪死了。更奇怪的是我的emule如果搜索就会非法操作，百试百中。可能因为我搜的“Anita, no te rajes”吧。他们好象说这样子下载侵犯版权，所以要删，但为什么其它的又不用了？一个TVvideo的网站只有Anita, no te rajes的网页被删除，太不公平了吧！

发觉自己的日记实在太多，打死自己，于是决定每天只写1.5页，我真的好痛苦，打字就晕死我了，一次打接近3000字，英文的还要先打在Word，修改后再移到笔记本。每个星期都这样子打字，我真的受不了，太累人了。

于是今天回到公寓的时候，这个星期的英文日记没有打在电脑上修改及发表，化学没有做完，毛论没有抄正，数学半题没做，是完全失败的表现。连找那个虚拟语气的表达也是快要出门的时候随手拿了本语法书（英语课本里没找到）。

晚上11：00，我现在好想睡觉。