Perfectionist
Maybe, I’m a perfectionist, though till now, I’m not too serious, in my opinion. Sometimes I will take study very serious, it’s more than other things, however, it’s just the superficial phenomenon that others always knew. In fact, I believe, study is important, but my life, my friends, my happy experience are more important than that. For all the thing I take care, I can put study or work at another side at once. However, in here, in SCAU, I couldn’t let them know.
Beyond study, what can I do here? Enjoy the beautiful scenary? There’s no beautiful scenary here, except the endless dust and the terrible sunshine. Every time, when I walked on the road here, I just could feel hot, very hot. I want to flee, but have no where to hide. Can I enjoy the sun rise or sun set? No. First, I won’t get up too early and secondly, when the sun set comes, I have to do my necessary thing- eating, and then go back to dorm quickly and start my shower, because the classes in evening are waiting for me. There are too many classes, they even didn’t give me a chance to breath. Even I couldn’t breath, how I can enjoy the life? I don’t think the life here is worth of enjoying.
I know, I know all of that are just excuse. If I keep optimistical everywhere and every time, nothing is impossible. Humor doesn’t have any terribtory. Maybe I really use too many time in study, but it seems that’s still not enough. Compare with the life in high school, I have a lot of daydream now, no matter at what class (except English class). When I lose my heart in daydream, I can forget all teh trouble in any way. But as a realistic person, I know that kind of things are very childish, and just excape from the society.
"They feel they have to be all things to all people and do it all perfectly. They think, ‘I should, I must, I have to.’ Good enough is never good enough. Perfectionists cannot dilegate. They get angry that they have to carry it all, and they blow their tops. Then they feel guilty and they start the whole cycle over again."(quote from New Horizon College English Book2 Unit 7 Section A)
Am I a kind of that? I also cheer myself up, and don’t give up doing something, does it have any problems? I think, the only thing I must improve is that I should learn how to trust others, I didn’t need to do everything by myself in fact.
