我的天

离考试还有2天（包括今天），也是2006年的第2天。

复习的进展还是不见好转，这次我觉得自己是样样都沾到了但要我数个非常完整的复习科目我说不上。我真的好害怕，怕像上一次那样忽律文科导致文科“失陷”，但理科除了需要看书更多地需要大时间的练习，没有练习就等于没有复习。对其他人这也许不明显，但对我来说，我很清楚自己，自己的粗心大意是需要在练习中改进的。但时间紧迫，已经没有什么时间给我做大批量的题目了。对比先前的2次大学考试（指的四最后的总“战役”），第一次考了5科，第二次考了7科，这一次更加是破纪录要考8科，形势可以说是不容乐观。而且考试时间一再缩短，考试的科目之间可以说是没有喘息的机会。严峻的考验啊！！！！

也不知道为什么每到这种时刻我就特别困。还记得昨天的《物理化学》下午半睡的状态下，自己突然对自己说“我也知道你很痛苦，我也知道你一天都看这些东西很想死，很想去睡觉，但你不能谁啊！你谁了我可怎么办啊！”然后突然困意一下子消失了，于是就整个精神起来，本来怎么看怎么有问题的第二章突然好像被点通了一样，一切都似乎清晰起来，于是就越看越起劲。说不上是为什么，我觉得这是自己最明显的一次自我启示，而且效用可以说非常厉害。从来没有一个声音如此清晰地对自己说话。但不知道为什么昨天我真的感受到了。

我知道躺在床上看教科书看不到2分钟就会谁着，但又阻止不了下午自己在床上看教科书。难道那些教科书就那么的令人讨厌。其实我也不是十分讨厌它们，但看到那些不是好明白的问题脑筋好像被胶水粘起来了，for（puzzle=1；；puzzle++） if（asleep） break;，情况就是以上的语句。于是唯一逃脱迷惑的方法就是睡觉，但睡着了醒来的时候又很讨厌自己因此浪费了好多的时间，人啊！就是那么的可恶。

This morning, I started to recite the new words, during that time, I remembered a lot. I remembered an uncle, who had said if his son could study at the best university he would send his son abroad at once. In addition, what is not the first class university? In short, the school as I studied is the rubbish school. I was angry when he was saying that, however, I did not know how to refute him, I could not gave any witness. Then after awhile I remembered another person, whose son had gone to Singapore to continue his high school, and will finish his university there, and all the spending of study are paid by the government of Singapore. Can you think how intelligent he is? He is one of the exchange program students who have such a golden chance. He is my cousin. Compare with them, what am I? My parents do not have money or any power to control anything, and I am not such a genius, I am just an everyman. I cannot have any daydream that what if I was… No, never! Just do what I should do, I am xrspook, the lay folk one, that all.

I don’t like compare with anyone, just walk as I used to be. Used my own style, do my utmost; believe the simple life is good enough.